Are you afraid of the dark?

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It’s a funny feeling moving forward without really knowing where you are going. While I wouldn’t say that I am afraid of the dark, I certainly recognize its subtle warning to tread lightly. But what is it out there that is stopping me? What force is causing me to react so tentatively yet luring me forward at the same time? What is really lurking out there just beyond my reach?

I have been watching the dense, dark forest representing my goal for a very long time, but always with a keen awareness of the firm grip holding me back whenever I would venture too close to its edge. But now, without warning, this grip has been released – whether by force or fate – and with a child-like sense of curiosity, I blindly wander in without any real path.

It’s eerily quiet. I am desperately trying to coax my eyes to adjust to the darkness, hoping to catch some light reflecting off the shadows. But my eyes fail me. I am trying to not trip on the exposed roots or hit my head on the low hanging branches – ducking and diving purely on instinct and luck. I can hear the ground beneath my feet, reminding me that I have entered this place willingly. But my attention is drawn to my heart beat pounding in my ears, growing louder and more pressing in its rhythm and intensity.

I am completely alone.

Time no longer exists in this strange place. I have nothing to gauge it against to know if I am gaining ground or falling behind. I look around, searching in a naïve attempt to find safety, only to find nothing of comfort. I must continue to move for if I stand still, the quiet evils of the darkness will most certainly consume me. Am I going in circles? Everything looks the same as before. It is only by chance that I stumble upon a tiny opening of safety and I realize that I have been holding my breath the entire time. I gratefully take this moment to re-establish my bearings and quietly bring myself back to the original sense of calm and curiosity that led me here in the first place. My heartbeat continues to pound in my ears. Something is drawing me forward and my feet move once again in an unknown direction, my body unable to stop. Why do I submit to this pull and not just resist? Aren’t I supposed to stay still when one is lost in the forest? Shouldn’t someone be trying to save me?

And then I realize that I couldn’t even find my way back to the beginning even if I wanted to. And nobody knows that I am here.

It is the most compelling and strangely exhilarating feeling I have ever had. I do not know how, if or when I will emerge from this dark place or in what state. The only thing I know for certain is that I am exactly where I must be.

And surrounded by all this darkness and uncertainty, I couldn’t be any happier.

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I’d be a hypocrite if…

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I’d be a hypocrite if I constantly nag my son that:

1. He can be anything he wishes;

2. He can do anything he sets his mind to;

3. If he puts the effort into his dreams, they will inevitably come true…

And I don’t follow my own advice.

Meeting update

 I felt like this today minus the shopping bags...

I felt like this today minus the shopping bags…

So, I got lost. It’s amazing how when the adrenaline kicks in one’s focus becomes acute and actions become automatic. And its amazing how scary some neighborhoods can be when it does happen.

Anyhoo – I made it to the meeting with minutes to spare. Being perpetually early always allows me that buffer time for these inevitable bumps in the road. Thank god I’m a natural over-planner.

My first impression of her is that she is really short. We did the usual awkward measuring the difference in height against my hip to break the ice. But she was full of smiles which was very refreshing. You see, I went into this situation without any preparation – I simply wanted to let my instincts push me in the right direction. I knew that I would know from the second our hands touched whether or not this relationship would work out or not.

And walking into her studio, I felt immediately calm. This is the woman who will help me bring my conceptual ideas and fantasies into reality.

We chatted for three hours about everything creative – fabrics, styling, ideas, techniques. She served me cake and tea. It was a lovely afternoon. But most importantly, I got to see her in her natural environment and to observe her work. She is a classically trained pattern maker – no computers – and specializes in correcting errors for her clients. I am clearly in very good hands. Like me, she is a new business woman who has always been working on somebody else’s dreams and now she has taken the risk to make hers alone a reality. I admire that.

And despite my being new and completely foreign to this industry, she is happy to work with me. I am utterly thrilled.I left Montreal on such a high. We’ve agreed to begin the development process for my line of leggings. And I am back again next week to start putting my ideas together. Fabric selections will have to take place. Construction and labeling will have to be established. She has a flurry of people she wants to introduce me to.

I must remember to send flowers to that receptionist.

But wait a second – businesses fail all the time…

Leap of faith

Leap of faith

WTF.

Reality has just hit me. Who am I to design clothes for tall women? I don’t know the first thing about sewing, production processes, fabric selections or pattern making…

Ok, calm down – I do know that this is not something that I will be taking lightly. I do have a plan. I have done some research.

But I am also jumping rather blindly into an industry that is somewhat foreign to me. And this is what I will share with you as I go through this journey. All the ups and downs. And at the end of it all, you will be the first to see my creations and the ultimate completiton of my goals.

But where do I start?

At least I have a good understanding and instinct when it comes to business. That is half the battle. And I do enjoy a good adrenaline rush…

I’ve studied endlessly. I’ve been reading voraciously.
And most importantly, I’ve been told that my eyes glitter when I start to express all my ideas and thoughts…

Stay with me. You’ll see. It will get interesting very soon…

MY ankles are freezing – not yours miss 5’7

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Can someone please explain to me why 5’7 is considered tall? That a 34 inch inseam length is considered long? I am seriously feeling like a freak of nature here…

I will put it out there and just say what other truly tall women are only thinking…I am begging all websites, shops and catalogues – PLEASE! I IMPLORE you to stop luring me into your space, claiming that you will cater to my needs, filled with promises of jeans that will ACTUALLY be long enough – when what you really consider “long” is frankly more suitable for someone who barely clears my shoulder. You are only providing me with false hope and leave me feeling duped…

MY ankles are freezing! NOT someone who stands at 5’7! I put on a pair of what is considered tall length pants and voila…I get capris!! Thankfully, this whole skimmer length is very chic with the short crowd right now so I seem to be right on point. Who knew that I was a trendsetter? I’ve been running with that style for years now…

So if this is true – that I have been naturally a trendsetter for all these years with my skimmer jeans, then it would stand to reason that I could translate my ideas into actual product for tall women over 6 feet tall. It can’t be that hard, right?

So, don’t worry lovely tall ladies, I am working on some things meant just for us. And I mean what I say. But, please be patient with me…I am barely through my first week!

A woman’s body is simply stunning.

Does this inspire you?

Does this inspire you?

The curves of her waist. The shape of her hip. The long length of her legs. When it all comes together, it is simply stunning. Impossible to ignore. And begging to be draped in equally stunning fabric when she is forced to leave the house and be socially acceptable.

Her clothes should be meant to show off this body, in all of its glory.

A khaki cotton twill pant will simply not cut it. A basic button up blouse, that may or may not have darts in it, is possibly the saddest article of clothing available on the market; its only rival is the kitten heel.

Yet, despite the canvas that we are so fortunate to possess, it would seem that this is the only offering currently available to us tall, stunning women. A V-neck sweater offered in 5 different seasonal colours. A mid-rise “mom jean” because a low-waisted jean is considered too risqué.

No wonder I have been forced to hack my clothes to make them more interesting.

But we tell ourselves that at least it is in the correct proportions right? That there is nothing else available that fits! I can hear your exhasperated sighs through my internet connection as we speak. Trust me – I have been there myself. I can understand your frustrations. I have scoured the malls and shops just like you only to have left empty handed and dissapointed. I’ve watched my mini pint-sized friends find shopping gold. But really, just because this is the only selection available for women like us, does that mean that we should simply accept the status-quo and not try to seek something more from our fashion choices?!

Statistics tell us that because of better nutrition and overall quality of life, children are growing up taller than previous generations ever did. Our fashion plight may soon be coming to an end! We are already impossible to ignore in a crowd and soon, we will take over the world! But until that time comes when we are considered fashion mainstream, please, never settle for basic. And drape your body in the clothing that it so richly deserves!

Missed a post? Start from the beginning – unless you like walking into a conversation mid-sentence and fake laughing like you know what’s going on…

Day 1 – I’ve been dared to make my dream come true in less than 2 months…

Excuse me while I freak out for a bit

Excuse me while I freak out for a bit

What can I say – my life has hit a rut; the proverbial bump in the road. As most people do, I happen to work in an office. A fantastic corner cube with a window. 2 desks. People knock on the fake door. I have it all. But what they do not know is that I have a little secret…I actually lead a double life.

Analyst by day.
Fashion Designer by night.

I’m the equivalent of a modern-day superhero. Spiderman without the jumpsuit. But my boss doesn’t yell at me.

I must say that it’s not always easy to keep up with the daily charade. My thoughts wander regularly as I gaze out my window. How do I do it you ask? I barely sleep. And I happen to be a really good actress.
Why do I do it you ask? I really have nothing left to lose and I can never back down from a challenge – especially one that involved a high-five.

But most importantly, I seriously have nothing to wear!

OK-please don’t laugh…it’s true!

I’m a 6 foot tall woman living in a fashion world designed for a cute 5’4 physique. My ankles are freezing and I am utterly exhausted with trying to make due with what is available to me! Being the resourceful woman that I am, I have come up with a viable and brilliant solution – if I can’t find it, then I will make it.

I can already feel the creative juices flowing again. My ideas are endless. But to really get the adrenaline pumping through my veins, it has to be done in 2 months or less. We shook on it. It’s a done deal.

Can someone please tell me what have I gotten myself into this time?

I Need Your Help! Tall Women – this one is for you!

Please answer my short survey – I am currently in the development stages for a new, young, urban, street-style (ok, you get it) clothing line designed specifically for tall women.

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/L97XRJF

It’s short, but the data will help me take the next steps forward. Your participation is much appreciated! Please forward to as many individuals as possible…

Alissa xoxo